I was trudging to work this morning. It was cold. I had reached the bottom of the underwear draw this morning, so I had on that pair. The ones with the elastic that's just a tad perished. Consequently they were kind of falling down, and I had to keep hitching them up. My left shoulder was aching (where I broke my collarbone a couple of years back), as was my lower back. Suddenly my bones are now a more accurate barometer than the Channel 9 weather man. I was carrying a canvas tote. A "Big Christian Charity" freebie canvas tote. I think there was even muttering.
Somehow, it seems I am just one pair of support hose stockings away from being someone's loony grandmother.
9 comments:
"that pair." Oh, Lordy...I've got a pair that I painted in once, er, like two years ago and got paint on them. They're all spotted and yet I STILL hold onto the damn shorts! So not cool.
This is it: I am tossing them out tomorrow. Or over the weekend. Actually they've stretched to a comfortable fit. I'm just saying.
Muttering is quite endearing, actually. Post monkey-sex. But ditch that 'big christian charity' tote. So last season, sweetie.
I know, I know. I still haven't been able to find matching shoes either.
Is there a tissue tucked under your watchband, dear? Check now.
No, in the sleeve of my cardie.
YOU know what the real clincher is? If you start to smell 'medicine-y.' You know that smell that old people sorta have? That gel-capped vitamin odor? That one.
Does your cardie smell of moth balls? Just wondering. I actually kinda' like that smell. Reminds me of playing dress-up in clothes from the attic.
Okay. It was my mom's wedding gown crinolines. Happy with yourself now?
Medicine-y. Totally. And stale pee.
Instead of under shorts why not -- knit a jockstrap? Angora wool of course. You KNOW there's a pattern somewhere.
This was a great! image. You have me smiling.
How high was your waistband?
Kenyo, I linked to that exact article on my blog a few weeks back! I should get knitting...
Craig, armpit high of course!
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