If you came here today looking for glitter rainbows, misty valleys and powder blue unicorns then run, save yourselves. I'm cranky. Not all caps italic CRANKY, just regular lower case cranky.
I woke up feeling weird this morning, dry throat and a bit achey which may be a) advancing years or b) the start of some sort of bug. I sat on the couch for 10 minutes staring dead eyed at the morning news and considering whether it really would be nicer to stay in bed and read my book, even if it means giving up a day's pay. Fiscal needs won out, sadly.
I need to get this stat dec thingy signed for work, basically to say that I don't have a police record. Of course the deadline is today. Of course I didn't think to bring my passport as ID, because I don't have a driver's licence. So of course nobody will witness the damn thing.
I twisted my ankle walking up the street to the office. It's not real bad, just a bit achey. I don't think I've done any major damage to it, maybe just a very light sprain.
So there. In hindsight, I think I should have just given up the day's pay. You know those sorts of days? Just better to decide not to participate.
17 comments:
I hear dildos are the new 'cure all.' Just saying.
Totally. You forgot your passport, but surely not your latex penis with realistic balls and suction cup base? Go ride that bad boy all the way to the Gates of Hades in the Christian-y charity bathroom. Atsa make a boo-boo all besser....
Am I drunk? And where are my damn pants?
Dang! Wasn't I supposed to witness that for you? Sorry. If you can get an extension, I ca do it tonight as I will be in Newtown (going to a Blues concert at the Vanguard).
WORD: Pyrex glass dildos! I'm talking coffee table art here. Aesthetically pleasing visually! Who will know?!
Plus they heat up like a bitch in the dishwasher. That's what I read.
.: buzzed on screw-top chardonnay :.
Is someone cupping me?
Jeebus. You boys and your good ideas! I'm sitting here trying to decide if I can realistically just tell my boss I want to opt out for the rest of the day. Probably not.
Double Jeebus, while I was writing that you were all cross posting up a storm. The three Michaels. Two (or possibly three?) of which are buzzed by the sound of it
Mikey, I may get you to do that tonight. Good idea.
In a pinch, there's always your thumb. That'll do, pig.
There's no one here to cut me off.
"That'll do, pig" just made me sort. J'adore Michael, j'adore. We need to get drunk sometime together, you know that?
SNORT. Made me snort. Ech, I give up on today.
Ditto. I have a fresh bottle with my nam on it. Well. Now that you given 'thumbs up' a new meaning...
.: adjusting self :.
JEEBUS cripeS! these word verifications are killing me tongiht! Looks like a thai menu item!
"xgmkumhw" no MSG.
Three Michaels are better than one any day. PS - I have cat hair in my mouth.
Step away from the pussy, MG.
If all this banter hasn't cured your lower case crankiness I don't know what will...
Exactly! It certainly helps. I just love it when the Michaels get their wine on. :)
Alas, I am not buzzed on screw top (or any other kind) of chardonnay. That's for tonight.
Me, I'm just buzzed on life...
I heart pyrex glass dildos. Functional and yet not out of place in a Schraeger/Starck hotel lobby. Preferable giant size.
You boys and your toys.
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