5 Things About Customer Correspondence: Pushing The Limits Of My Patience & Composure Edition

• Here's the thing. If you are going to complain about something, say an invoice I sent you for example, would you bother to actually read it? Just give it a half-assed cursory glance? (Show of hands please.)
  
• Would you pepper your email with sentences whose grammatical anarchy is such that like a zen koan, or some deep Zoroastrian text, each reading implies a different meaning? Requiring a Rosetta Stone or haruspicy to translate, perhaps?
  
• Although, and to be fair, I must say that it was clear that some of it was apparently questions, as thoughtfully indicated by the string of between 4 and 6 question marks.
  
• Likewise the carefully constructed strings of exlamation marks!!!!!!, some too numerous to count, which I choose to read as enthusiasm.
  
• Would you then freely admit, after 5 emails, when quizzed over the phone, that you probably should have 'read it first'?

::headdesk::