Wednesday, December 07, 2005

5 Wednesday Snippets

  • Even when I am not trying to be, I am such a fag. Today I went and bought a diary for next year; nice, matte black, soft cover, day to a page. So I'm back at the office and start writing in it, when I notice the diary has a style name stamped on the cover, in nice big friendly letters. I'm now the proud owner of a diary called Vanessa.
  • I think I pee more than any other human being. Sure I drink lots of water, and I started the day with two diuretic coffees, but seriously. I wouldn't be surprised if my workmates think I'm cruising the men's room.
  • Given the new batch of hot European students at the intensive language school on my floor, maybe that isn't such a bad idea... (No, I kid! Really. For a start, half of them don't wash their hands.)
  • It's neither Autumn here, nor do we celebrate Thanksgiving* (and even if we did it has passed already I know, but it takes US magazines a few months to get here). Despite these facts I went ahead and bought the Thanksgiving issue of Martha Stewart Living magazine anyway. This just reinforces the first point, right?
  • I cannot function on 6 hours of broken sleep. It may not look like it, but I've actually been napping with my eyes mostly open since about 3 o'clock this afternoon.

* OK, I know I went to a Thanksgiving dinner this year but that was given by an American friend and the rest of us are really there for the free food.


Michael said...

I heart Vanessa from afar! Oh, that is rich.
Have you seen Max's hipster PDA? I was all set to make one just like it, when I noticed the leather index card holder at Target. Grey leather that perfectly matches my car seats no less. So it's a gay hipster PDA.
Not surprisingly, I pee constantly too! I also make frequent non-urinating trips to the bathroom for tucking and generally righting myself. It's a terrible habit, but I'm constantly retucking and straightening everything. A borderline tic. I've even overheard the girls discussing it, but I'm all but powerless to stop it.
As twinned as we are otherwise, I'm indifferent to Martha. I don't dislike her. I mean, I've been known to stop channel surfing if she's got someone making the most adorable little marzipan pumpkins, but otherwise...meh.

The Other Andrew said...

"...I'm indifferent to Martha." ::sits up::

What? WHAT?

Oh yeah, I did actually already know that. I don't understand how you can look at the darling little turkey placecard holders made from pom poms and felt and still resist the charm. Or the beyond rustic floral decorations made from pieces of pinecones...

Have you no soul?!

Tucking and untucking huh? No, that shirt does NOT make you look fat, ok? Yes, the pants are fine, no, not a hint of 'pear'.

I heart you.

duane said...

I LOVE that you bought a diary that had Vanessa on it. Classic! Unrelated, but still silly, I bought my mom a birthday card once that said, "to my mother on her birthday. Now that I am a father..." I didn't bother to read the inside... d'oh!