Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Truth & Fiction

The Fiction:
The lie we tell the tourists...

Impossibly Cute

The Truth:
Feral killers of the bush...

The Smackdown

Both photos were taken at the Koala Park, Pennant Hills last Sunday with Morgan. Thankfully the ratio of cute fuzzy koalas was greater that that of feral killers crazed with bloodlust. Fortunate huh?

17 comments:

Q - 60's girl said...

"The lie we tell the tourists..." Ahhh they are so poised! What a cute shot. They look so soft and chunky. Of course I would never go near one they can certainly be nasty, those claws and little teeth sharpened on eucalyptus leaves *shudder* i would hate having one of them latch on....

The Other Andrew said...

I got to pat one, and he was hella cute. He was doing some serious subvocal growling and rumbling though... but apparently that's normal communication. I wouldn't want to get scratched or bitten by one of them though.

Jen said...

Feral killers of the bush...

Did you have to put it quite this way? I'll never look at one of those things again without feeling a creeping need to guard my crotch. ;)

Miss Eudoxia said...

One of my least favourite animals to treat. Cute and cuddly they are not!!!! they also have the whole rape thing down pat when it comes to reproducing.
They also smell :-)

Mikey (The Lovely Ex) said...

Yes, not nice at all, really. I'm not even convinced they are cute in the first place. I have a friend (yes, yes, only the one...) who was attacked at Koala Park by one. He needed stitches to his neck and cheek. Nasty. Sorry for all those of you overseas who about all this myth shattering

Michael Guy said...

I suppose you wish to trample all over my "Crocodile Dundee" fantasy as well?

Michael said...

Never mind the dingo, stay tuned to TOA next week as we hear the chilling cry, "Oh my God! A platypus ate my baby!"

Bodhi said...

These questions about Australia are allegedly from potential visitors. Apparently they were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a sense of humour. (more....)


Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK)

A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA)

A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - Can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)

A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.

Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Australia? (Sweden)

A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay? (UK)

A: What did your last slave die of?

Q: Can you give me some info about hippo racing in Australia? (USA)

A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not... oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings Cross. Come naked.

Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA)

A: Face south and then turn 90 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia? (UK)

A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)

A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia? (UK)

A: You are a British politician, right?

Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany)

A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter gatherers. Milk is illegal.

Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum (USA)

A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.

Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. (UK)

A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath

DV said...

A few years ago we did the Roar and Snoar thing at Taronga Zoo. (very cool, highly recomend it to anyone) Anyway, in the morning we got taken around to see the koalas and there was the little baby koala hooked on to the back of the mama koala and both were sitting there blinking in the sunshine looking exactly like stuffed toys.
They really are kinda cute but so very very very boring to look at. At leats the vicious (sp?)one you saw would have been interesting.

Q - 60s - girl said...

Michael Guy, which part of your crocodile dundee fantasy? But seriously crocodiles are way more friendly : )

Q - 60s - girl said...

Oh i mean just remember to run in a zig zag way - they are quicker in a straight line!!!

Mindy said...

Someone compared my baby daughter to a koala yesterday. Now I wonder what she really meant!

The Other Andrew said...

Mindy, I'm sure it was the cute koala aspect they were referring to! She doesn't have claws, does she?...

tigtog said...

Andrew, you really wouldn't want to forget the nail-trimming schedule for a baby, is all I'll say. Other than ouch.

The Other Andrew said...

Colin, a Canadian ex of mine, used to refer to me as Cuddly Koala, now that I cast my mind back... maybe he was a bigger than I gave him credit for?...

Tigtogs, I see where you're coming from. Ouch indeed!

The Other Andrew said...

A bigger "bitch" that should have read....

Anyway, proof reading is for pussies.

amy said...

I once saw this documentary about koalas and it was showing them in mating season. Jeez, they looked and sounded like pigs. But pigs with HUGE teeth and BIG ASS claws.