Ok, I'm watching the Eurovision finalists - the semi-finals to pick the last 10 contestants for the big night on Sunday.
Song three has just started, and so far it hasn't disappointed. Bulgaria had a back-up singer who looked like a drag queen with a bleached blonde goatee.
Oh, sweet, sweet Eurovision. Ich liebe dich!!
[Updated: Oh. My. God. Belgium has cute dancing boys in black leather corsets! As Morgan just said, "Europe looks like a very alien place right now". Word.]