A Long Week

This is not a downbeat "Yeah verily for I am weary" post, but Jeezalou it seems like this week has gone on forever. I know that my US readers had a holiday this week, so this one is not likely to speak to you on a personal level, but for me this seems to have been a loooong one. It's been at least, what, 9 or 10 days so far, right? I'm sure of it.

Maybe it's end of financial year/start of the new one which has made me busier than usual. Maybe it's after hours busy-ness with stuff to do at the Buddhist centre. I'm not sure what the cause is but it sure has made me look forward to the weekend. I was supposed to be working on a book stall at a Tibetan cultural festival tomorrow, but I've had some volunteers drop out and it has put the project in jeopardy. You know what though? I'm not that bothered. It would be nice to have the day free. Tonight is a night out for dinner and a burlesque show (!) with some of my favourite Flickrazzi peeps, so not getting up early tomorrow would be nice.

Real nice.

Bodhi Is An Enabler

After the recent talk of Mint Slice biscuits, and their wiley mood enhancing ways, I arrived home last night to find a new food item in the now sparkling (and still vanilla scented) refrigerator... a gleaming new packet of Mint Slices. Ahhhhhh.

Ten Canoes

Last night was full of treats, an embarrassment of riches if you will! I met up with Morgan straight after work (treat number 1), and we had an early bite to eat at Happy Chef in Newtown before heading to the cinema to see the film Ten Canoes by Rolf der Heer and Peter Djigirr (treat number 2).

Oh and there was a Boysenberry choc top ice cream thrown in to the mix too (which understandably was treat number 3).

It's quite a rare gem of a film and a really different cinema experience. Filmed entirely with a cast of indigenous Australian actors and in the Yolgnu Matha language of Arnhem Land, with English narration, it tells a traditional story in the traditional language. It's about the telling of a tale, in this instance an education tale told by an elder to instruct a younger member of the tribe. A simple story told in a complex way.

The 'present day' aspects of the film are set before the coming of white men, with the flashback segments of the story set many generations before, so the setting portrays the traditional lifestyle that most non-indigenous Australians would have limited awareness of. What I loved about it though is that the personalities and humour of the characters come through wonderfully, with the traditional language adding to the experience. The charismatic narration by David Gulpilil also adds to the enjoyment and humour of the film. Aside from the humour, the film has a great look too, with beautiful tight close-ups and sweeping panoramic shots of the Arafura Swamp region of northern Australia.

Here is an early article about the film from a few years ago, when filming was about to commence. This review from the Hollywood Reporter has some interesting factoids about the film.

On the way home Morgan and I had a close encounter with a friendly and very inquisitive possum (treat number 4). I tried to get a picture of him but had trouble focussing in the dark. Morgan held up his mobile to snap a few pics, and got some pretty good ones as the possum reached out for the phone.

A great night.

My Name Is TOA, And I Have Seasonally Affective Disorder

At least, I hope I do because then that makes me a victim you see rather than someone who has the poor taste to just be grumpy. Then it's not my fault, capice?

It's grey, it's raining, I'd like to pull up the covers and call in dead today but no work-y no money. Ack, sing a song of woe time folks, follow the bouncing mood swing! Another cup of coffee, maybe a restorative morning tea time Mint Slice biscuit or two four and dry socks/warmer toes later and then expect a post on How Very Grand Life Is.

So. What's to tell, let me see. I changed pillows last night. I've gone so overboard with the kitchen cleaning routine (using my new favourite product Vanilla Fridge Wipe - last night it was the inside of the dishwasher's turn) that my entire kitchen smells like vanilla. It's a bit much. For the second time in about 6 weeks my home phone line seems to have gone down last night. Dead air.

Time for a Mint Slice I think...

5 Ways To Cure A Sunday Morning Bad Mood:

1. Clean bedroom* and wash almost every piece of clothing you own.
   
2. Organise to have the neighbour's banana palm that broke off and landed in your backyard chopped up and taken away.
   
3. Throw out all the dubious food in the refrigerator and clean that sucker to within an inch of its enamel with something strong and vanilla smelling.
   
4. Crank up an extended remix of a favourite song, set to REPEAT, and dance in your bedroom, on your own.
   
5. Most importantly, meditate on the suffering of others. I spell that P-E-R-S-P-E-C-T-I-V-E.

[* Big job. Make take several bad moods.]

Hurry Summer

Furled
Originally uploaded by Other Andrew.

You know how by half way into winter you start to crave the hot sun on your face? Lightweight, flat fronted trousers? Open toed shoes? Lazy picnic afternoons? Boys with their shirts off? Yeah gods, it seems like winter has been hanging around for ages. I'm all caps OVER IT I must say.

Thankfully hibiscus have the good grace to flower all through the winter here. Giving their tropical middle finger to the concept of winter. A litle punch of hot red in the face of a grey day. And yes, it also means that by much of the world's standards this time of year is incredibly mild mannered. Still, it's a question of what you're used to because summer in Sydney is heaven.

Bitesize

Bitesize
Originally uploaded by morgspace.

Morgan just posted this pic to Flickr and it cracks me up. I'm not sure whether he's calling me bitesized or the mini cupcake...

[Picture taken at the Sydney Photobloggers get together at Meredith & Andrew's house last night, for the eating of Mexican food and the viewing of honeymoon pics. I bought along 2 dozen mini cupcakes from a fabulous store called BabyCakes. Nummy nums.]

Merely Labelled

Weed
Originally uploaded by Other Andrew.

One of the terms that crops up all the time in teachings by Lama Zopa Rinpoche is "merely labelled". Every time we receive some sort of stimulus, we apply labels to it. The first label might be "flower" but it might also be "pink" or "pretty", or in this case "weed". This is Lantana, it is both pretty and also a noxious weed in Australia. Without knowing that I would definately have labelled it "pretty", I mean it is pretty, let's face it. It's a 'good' label. Knowing that it strangles out great swathes of native plants though makes me also apply the label 'bad' to it.

We make these judgements and apply these labels all the time don't we? One day the beach is glorious, another day the sun's too hot, the sand's getting in your shoes, I'm going to get sunburned... The beach hasn't changed, so what has? You. Your mind. Your attitude. The way you choose to label it. That's what Rinpoche is trying to make us see, everything around us we have labelled. It's important to challenge those labels, and examine how true they are.

Snapshots In Time

Blogging is a curious thing. Fabulous, sometimes a bit of a struggle, and frequently very illuminating. I never kept a diary before I started blogging. I would decide to, jot down a few pages, and then lose motivation. Inevitably I would have just read the diaries of Virgina Wolfe, or Gertrude Stein or some other vintage diarist (not just lesbians I hasten to add) and decide that being a diarist would be Very Grand Indeed.

History of the "such-and-such did such-and-such on this day" type bores me to tears, but books about how people lived, what they enjoyed, how they dressed and what they ate fascinate me. Social history. I'm nothing if not social, and apparently it's how I like my history too. I mention this because being a diarist, or journal keeper, or even blogger of the "today I had noodles for lunch" school does not really interest me. Thoughts and feeling do, sometimes I like to record a day in words or pretty pictures sure, but mostly this is about how I felt on that day.

So I mention this in the context of the entry I made on Monday night. It reflects where I was at on the day. I'm not distancing myself or downplaying it, just putting it into the context that it is a snapshot of a moment in time. A moment when I was pretty cranky with myself for being silly, a bit paranoid and for forgetting some of the lessons I've spent the past few years learning. In that context it's interesting for me too, as I hope it might be for you, because it also reinforces what I know to be true.

Impermanence. None of us are the same person we were two years ago, two weeks ago, or two hours ago. Ditto for the future. This too shall pass, the 'good' and the 'bad'. Trying to hold onto any of that, thinking that things can exist as fixed in time, or that there is an unchanging "I" that can be fixed in time, is a recipe for disaster and dissatisfaction. Sometimes this blog shows me all sorts of lessons about just how changeable things are, and just how different my thoughts, reactions and judgements can be depending on the mental state I am in at the time. Potent stuff and a valuable lesson.

Committee

So, tonight I attended the AGM of my Buddhist centre, nominated for a position on the Executive Committee and was elected. I'm really pleased. As important as being the bookshop manager is to me, it'll be great to also be a part of the team that is responsible for guiding the bigger picture. More about ensuring that all the goals of the centre are met. I'm chuffed because it's a way of giving back to a centre that has given me so much. My role running the bookshop won't change, because the committee only meets about 4 or 6 times a year and is primarily concerned with structure and direction. Exciting times ahead.

Old Patterns

Do you ever see yourself as others see you? Do you ever have moments where you see your behaviour as someone else might see it? Just the outward appearance of things, without all the back story, hopes, fears, decisions, justifications, experience and weaknesses that lead you to that point? To only see the tip of the iceberg, the bit that manifests above sea level. See level, perhaps.

Sometimes I get those moments and they can be quite sobering. Sure that's me, my words and my actions, but that's not the full picture. There's a story behind it. There's a prologue, footnotes and a glossary that needs to be read before you really understand the sentence.

I see the way I can behave when rattled, when feeling that things might not be going right and there must be something, anything, I can do to stop it. To fix it. To make sure that things really are alright. The slightly crazed manic edge, the one that endlessly asks "Are things ok? Is it ok? Are you ok?" but is really asking "Am I ok? Do you think I'm ok?"

Gah. Even I find it exhausting and irritating, and its my behaviour we're talking about here. All that energy seeking validation.

I don't want to overstate the issue, we're talking about occasional behaviours here. One thing I am not is a gibbering validation seeking missile. I'm talking about the moments when you hear the words as they leave your mouth and you go "Oh, shit. Here we go again with the same old song. Why did I say that, rather than just keeping my big mouth shut?"

Anyhoo, seeing a problem is the first step in understanding and then solving a problem. The ruthless exploration of my own mind, and all the many lessons I've learned through Buddhism about mind delusions, about how destructive the stories we tell ourselves can be, have both helped and made the behaviour more noticeable to me.

Partly we're talking about confidence here, about not getting paranoid, about not expecting worst case scenarios, about not applying the Doom Filter and learning to just basically chill the fuck out for Chrissakes.

More Proof Of My Puppy Obsessiveness

After a cool start to the day this morning, the sun came out and it turned into a gloriously mild and sunny winter's day. A lunchtime meeting with a blogger friend of Morgan's, and her family, down at Coogee beach turned into a great afternoon of eating, chatting, taking photos and spot of seaside strolling.



We walked along to the 'off lead' dog park around the point from the beach, and chanced upon a crowd gathering to watch a couple of whales frolicking just off shore. I didn't have a strong enough lens to capture the whales (although Morgan did!), but I did see some wonderful leaps through a pair of binoculars.



But, oh the PUPPERS! Dogs everywhere. This beautiful Shepherd came and sat with me for a while, received some pats and sat for a few pics, before heading off again.



This miniature Schnauser was one of a pair, owned by a lovely lady who stopped and chatted, encouraged her dogs to pose and receive pats, and watched whales with us for a bit. There were dogs of all shapes and sizes, playing in big friendly packs.

Heaven.

Surrender Dorothy

So, the show last night was fantastic. The orchestra played live in front of the movie on a giant screen, to a digitally remastered print that had all the music removed. The main songs and all the incidental music. I wanted to get up and warble along with Judy on more than one occasion. Sadly, no skipping arm in arm with my favourite cowardly lion though (although I could have possibly found a bear or two in the audience).

The logistics of playing in time with a pre-recorded vocal boggle my mind a bit, although it's probably not that far removed from what movie orchestras have to do when recording a regular soundtrack. The conductor would have to match the timing of the original orchestra and then not deviate from it noticeably.

The sound quality of the movie varied a bit, which was a teeny bit distracting every now and then. In few scenes the dialogue was a bit soft and the sound effects quite loud. No fault on behalf of the orchestra though, they were excellent. Much of the time I found myself so caught up in the film that I forgot it was an orchestra I was listening to! The audience reaction was very enthusiastic, but the format obviously does not allow for an encore. Hey, let's play that all again! Once more from the top!

But what you really want to know is, was the place crawling with gay boys? Well yes, and no. There were couples here and there, and the odd gaggle of six or so, but it was a popular night with families. Kids, kids and more kids. Morgan and I had 4 pre-teen girls behind us who got The Look from me for chatting and seat back kicking a few times, but I kind of hated myself for it a bit afterwards because it was a long show for small kids to sit through. They did ok.

The Morgster and I both looked pretty fine, me in a high button black suit with striped shirt and charcoal silk tie, and himself in a dark navy suit and charcoal shirt. The Opera House was a glorious as ever, glowing slightly in a misty and slightly rainy winter's night. We had a light, late supper afterwards of savoury pastries and a hot chocolate over looking the harbour.

It was a great night.

Breakfast Of Champions

A winter Saturday morning.



Plus porridge with honey & sultanas.



Plus strong black coffee = a good start to the day.

I'm kinda happy right now.

Just When You Thought I Couldn't Get Any Gayer...

Tonight Morgan and I are off to the Opera House to see a Wizard of Oz extravaganza. A celebration of Garland in a gingham frock, with red shoes that kind of clash with that outfit really, but being sparkly and magical and all we are willing to overlook that fact.The Sydney Symphony will play along with a newly transcribed score, including previously lost pieces, while a new remastered print of he film plays behind.

I'm guessing there'll be 6, maybe 7, straight men in he entire place, tops.

There's no place like home, for homos at least.

Now all I need is for Wicked to make it's way Down Under...

Here Kitty Kitty!

Just so you don't think I only like puppies...



...I'm partial to kitties too.

[Chinatown shop window, snapped last night on the way to dinner with the Sydney Photobloggers.]

Small Packages

Man, I need a dog. I cannot pass a creature of the canine persuasion without cooing and reducing myself to a complete gibbering idiot. On Monday night Morgan and I had dinner at the home of Morgan's friend Canice, and both Morgan and I were desotted by his little dog. A little bundle of personality with black button eyes and fur soft as silk. Oh sure, those of you with Small Dog Aversion are probably struggling to see the charm right now, but picture a cross between an ewok, a mogwai and a teddy bear and you are close to this little bundle. Chuck in a fiesty attitude towards the game of fetch and a healthy ability to play tug of war with a squeaky ball. All thankfully yap-free.

I generally gravitate towards bigger dogs, but having had a pack of smaller dogs (in a previous life as Dog Show Widow) I grew to appreciate the little fiesty guys too. All that personality in a pint-sized package. Anyone?

Winter Is A Comin' In

Some lunchtime sights, on a grey and rainy day. Most of today it rained lightly and constantly, then when I left work the sky was piled up with heavy, slate coloured cloud. Back lit and somehow nacreous. Ten minutes later it was full dark and raining heavily, and I was glad to have my umbrella, scarfe and heavy cashmere & wool coat.

In the middle of the day though, all it took was a close glance to see that everything had been glossed, coated in shellac, and sprinkled in gems.

Nice Feelings

1. Really warm feet on a really cold day.
   
2. Little puppy dog snuffles in your ear.
   
3. A new doona.
   
4. Holding a small dog in the crook of your arm.
   
5. A belly full of really good genuine home-made Thai food, made by a lovely Thai lady.

Winter Colour

Finally a bright and sunny winter Saturday! It was cool, but not so cold, and a perfect day to run rampant with a camera in the company of a bunch of my Sydney Photoblogger friends from Flickr.



This lady was one of a pair of costumed characters passing out fortune cookies with road safety warning messages and conducting a survey about road safety in Newtown. Possibly the strangest Road Safety concept ever, but memorable.



A fabulous vintage ride on King Street south. I heart fins and rocket tail lights.



A bakery window on King Street. If the place had been open there would have no biscuits left to photograph and my ass would twice its current size.



My mantra.