Forget your tasteful baubles! Eschew Martha Stewart(TM) evergreen swags and bows! Cast aside tinsel! Deck the halls with weird this Christmas!
From the home of Western decor Spurfect!, come these jolly Christmas characters to decorate your ranch:
Less "Frosty The Snowman" and more "Clanky The Horsehoe".
(Faint horseshit smell sold seperately.)
Any guesses? Why it's a Horseshoe Cowboy Santa of course!
Feel the need to show your Pro-Life, Pro-Iraq War conservative stance in a festive manner? Don't just hang a yellow ribbon on the old Christmas Tree, hang a soldier fetus instead!
"Protect our troops - from the womb to the war. What if the fetus you were going to abort would grow up to be a soldier bringing democracy to a godless dictatorship?...
...Show that you support the "culture of life" by buying and proudly displaying one of these patriotic unborn Americans."
(Oh, and yes don't panic, this product is a satire. Thankfully. Via feministing.)