My fears came to fruition today, in a swifter and more brutal way than I anticipated, and just 2 weeks away from the end of my 6 month probation period I was fired. Told I could leave immediately and would only be getting the bare required pay out of a week's wages under the probation terms. This is the first time I have ever been let go from a workplace, in the past I have always been the one to resign.
I'm feeling much more hurt by the whole experience than I would have thought, and I think it's the callousness and coldness of the act that has really gotten to me. Aside from the practicalities of not having money saved, of having rent and bills to pay, and only a small amount of money coming my way, it's that feeling of being discarded that I haven't encountered before. I rang my friend Judy immediately after, trying not to burst into tears in the middle of the street, and like a wise and good friend she administered dinner, gin & tonics and laughter. It sure helped.
Tomorrow is a new day, and on the upside I don't have to get up early for it.