5 Things: The I've Been Dieting Like A Bastard & Lost 9kgs, No Really That's Like Almost 20 lbs, Edition

• Unpredictability. Just when you think you’re going to ace a good result bam! a small gain, and conversely sometimes a weekend of drinking and carousing with only moderate self control is rewarded with a loss. I’ve learned to be sanguine about day to day fluctuations, it’s the forward momentum that counts. And I suspect it means The Universe smiles upon drinking and carousing.
  
• Suspense. (See unpredictability.) Seriously, the only way the wait for the numbers on the scale could get any more suspenseful would be if my life cut away to an ad break just before I found out if I’m going to be above the yellow line.
  
• Reward. It’s what I do. Rewards can be given for a) round numbers, b) odd numbers, c) percentages (-10% of my original starting weight was rewarded with retail therapy at Zara), d) for encouragement and e) on a whim.
  
• Pride. All kidding aside, I’ve stuck with it even when I was jonesing for a pizza, or any number of other squidgy high fat delights, and both the numbers and vast reduction in belly don’t lie. My all round health is better too, especially important stuff like my blood pressure. For all of the above I’m proud of what I’ve achieved.
  
• Smugness. I’m trying not to be, but I have moments of smug.